Happiness Comes In All Shapes, Sizes And Colours.

How do we define happiness?
It holds a different and a unique meaning for every individual.
There are no heavy words, no deep meaning attached to it.
True happiness is in the small things that we do everyday.
The little joys of life, as we call them.
To some happiness is eating their favourite snack.
To some happiness is going for a long drive, for others it may be in reading a novel, while some may be happy in just lazying around in their beds.
We must never give the key of our happiness in the hands of the other, even if the other is a very close loved one or a person whom we do not know.
Everyone has the right to be happy. It is what we live for everyday!

When I say, 'happiness comes in all shapes and sizes' what thoughts come to your head?
Tall-Short-Light-Heavy-boxes of different colors. Yes, that is exactly what i am writing about today. Aren't  we all just like those boxes? Some of us are Tall , some are short , some have a big built while others are on the slimmer side. Some of us are black, some white and others brown. We are all the same yet, differ in our appearances.

Is it a crime to be different? as far as I am concerned.. I don't think it is a problem.

Wouldn't it get so boring if we were all the same?

We are unique individuals, we have different capabilities, different choices, different views, different habits and lifestyle. how can we be all same?
I don't understand the hype over Skinny - being defined as the only appealing built - Fair being considered as the only criteria of being beautiful - A certain race being considered superior to the rest !

When God created you and me, he did not make us all the same. Why? because he made us all unique and blessed us with different strengths and temperaments. he cast us all into different moulds, because he too realised that there needs to be variety in life!
Alas! we humans don't appreciate this fact. We are quick to judge.

These are some common , over used statements that you must have heard people make :-

"She is Mrs. Sharma's daughter" , "Ohh.. that fat girl? can't even differentiate her neck from the rest of the body" , [ woh mrs.sharma ki beti hai. ohh..woh moti ? Uski toh gardan hi nahin dikhti!]

"Hey, do you remember, Rohit?" "Who Rohit? That guy who's Black in color? [ oye, rohit yaad hai kya? kaun rohit? woh kaala kaala sa?]

"That Bihari ! Malli ! Nigger ! Chinki ! Paki ! "

" [ a girl wearing salwar kameez ] Look at that behenji!" "That chic wears short skirts, i'm sure she sleeps around.. such a slut!"

The list is never ending. we never stop judging others. All of us have judged the other person at one point of time. Ofcourse, Whynot? We live in an educated country, where fair is beautiful, thin is pretty, suit/sari is behenji, midis/shorts is slutty. [ I hope, you get the Irony here.]

I have met so many people who deal with these stereotypical comments on a daily basis. Why go far? I, have been a prey to such negative thoughts about my very own self at such an age, where the smallest of things affect your personality so deeply. Maybe, that's the reason why after knowing that I can do things, I didn't have the confidence that I could really do them. Even in the school when we were in the junior side, our teachers would choose the fair ones to conduct the prayer assembly. I would write something and they would read it. It was later that I realized that when we reached the senior side, no one even remembered who those 'fair girls' were, for our true capability spoke for ourselves. But, such things always leave a mark on our minds.
Many of my relatives, friends, juniors and seniors who know me, may find this as a shocker, because it's not something that goes with the personality of a 5 Foot 7 Inches tall girl like me.
But, how do people look at a teenager who is dusky and broad ? She doesn't qualify the standards of, 'being pretty, right?' so, no matter how good I would I would have looked I always thought it wasn't good enough.
{ also note, being broad is a built, accept it! but, excess weight is a different thing, it will obviously make you easily susceptible to health problems. Try to stay healthy! Carry yourself (your personality as a whole) in such a way that even Naomi Campbell gets jealous :D }

I am sure there are many like me. Who have been commented at for their complexion, weight, height or race. That's okay. It is human tendency to play mind games and pull down those who are rising rapidly. Make yourself stronger and fight them!

As the yester years buxom beauty Marylin Monroe stated, "No one ever told me I was pretty when I was a little girl. All little girls should be told they're pretty. So what if no one told her that? didn't she carve a niche for herself? don't we all quote her? have her posters, wallpapers?she fought against being stereotyped!

It is only since the past few years that the beauty standards and the Indian Mentality have undergone a metamorphic change. We have started accepting the fact that 'Dusky (that's our trademark Indian complexion) has an unbeatable sex appeal' , 'Curvy Women (that's our trademark Indian Feature) are attractive and plainly envied'

It took me quite sometime to come out of that frame of mind and leave that mental block behind. With education and family values comes maturity and a better understanding of things. You understand that these are just labels people make and they don't define you. I did it on my own, I was a teenager and as we know, it is an age of stress and strain. I managed and survived. Also, I owe to few of my parents, family, well wishers, friends and now also my Husband who has always encouraged me . I broke out of that shell or cocoon and, today I can say that, I Love The Way I Am. There can be no other Rebecca Luther nee Singh. ( not in a narcissistic way! that's just vain! )
There can be no other Neeti or Anu or Neha or Surabhi or Akshat or Nitin or Traptika or whatever your beautiful name is.
There is just one You!

Today, I want to use my gift to make a difference in the lives of all those who feel undermined, under confident, cornered, those who feel they compete with others - even though they maybe brighter than them. Why do you feel this way? remember that, You are no less than the other..no one can compete with you because firstly, there is no competition!

The only person you compete with is, you yourself!
Be the best of what you are, what you can be.

Broad, skinny, slim, thin, fat, chubby, dusky, wheatish, fair, dark, tall, short doesn't determine your success or acceptance in the society or for that matter, even your appeal to the other gender.
Your confidence, determination and hard work determines how far you go in life! You heart determines how you are loved and who loves you!

You have the power to make others happy!Do you realize it? Not Yet? It is about time that you do. You are a powerhouse of energy. An energy that can drive you, closer to your goals. An energy that can move mountains.

Never let anyone even try to diminish that energy in you.

P.S. An advice for all the readers :-

[ You must have heard the word 'Aura' before. Aura is ,"a supposed emanation surrounding the body of a living creature and regarded as an essential part of the individual.'' You must always try to keep it clean. We meet so many people daily, some may be pessimistic, some may not be wishing good for you, some may be plain negative. They all have an ill effect your aura.
Cleaning your aura is essential for spiritual hygiene. By cleaning your aura on a daily basis, you protect yourself against psychic attacks and illnesses. A clean aura is charismatic and will encourage better relations with others. Negative thought forms used in black magic and generated from the ill will, jealousy and/or anger of others attach to one’s aura and invite misfortune such as accidents, illnesses and so forth.
salt water-soak : Just put a little salt in the bucket of water when you get ready to bathe, or opt for rainwater cleansing, cleansing by wind.
Was away all negativity and feel Refreshed.]